Bonds Know No Distance

[mirroredcommand]

The night was dark and deep and long in space, never ending, without a dawn to break the line between waking and sleep, day and night, beginning and end. It made existence endless, broken only by the silent running of the clocks on the wall, the movements of work, food, and sleep. Without these things, without the sureness of a schedule, time became meaningless. Even the stars could not keep him company.

So after Kirk came and 'visited', time resumed its endless patterns, moving on and on without pause or break or concept. For a man used to near-constant action, it was a form of torture more exquisite then any bit of pain or distress. More then anything, it was a torture that gave him nothing to focus his mind on anything but the swelling pain of the broken bond. It was swiftly becoming over whelming, completely and utterly. There was nothing left to keep the pain away, and with his shields designed only to block out Spock's light intrusions instead of a full on force, they were failing after being buffeted for so long. In short, he was going mad.

His expression showed little of the internal war except for the strong brow being furrowed and the age-lines at the edges of the eyes and corners of the mouth looking thicker. It was his hands that gave him away, gripping fiercely into the fabric of the bed he was reclining on. A headache was throbbing behind his eyes in time with his heart, a thick red-hot band of light that was searing like a knife into his mind. Deeper, deeper with every beat of his heart.

Every part of him was focused on maintaining the failing shields, rebuilding them as Spock had taught him those years ago. He had survived torture from Vulcans who knew precisely what to do in the mind, but could not stop this. This bond that had been forced onto him but in the end welcomed, this bond that had saved his life many times in the past, that had saved the life of his first officer and friend, this bond that had been a respite from a world where one could never relax... this bond was killing him. It would destroy him as surely as any blade to the heart.

SPOCK!

Never screamed aloud, never aloud. Instead, strong white teeth bit firmly into his lip, hard enough to send a trickle of crimson along his chin, down to his jawline. The pain, the strain, had been steadily increasing since James Kirk's visit to his cell, as if the reminder of the bond and speaking of it had started a chain reaction. He had long since started to keep his eyes closed [was it hours? minutes? weeks? centuries?] because at least this way the room would not spin. He was starting to feel that same spinning in his mind, making his world wobble like a child's toy.

It seemed hours passed this way. A day? Perhaps. He vaguely heard someone calling him, but did not dare respond. Still trapped in the arms of the enemy, he could not let a weakness be seen. The smell of food made his stomach swell and gurgle, but not from hunger. It felt like his entire body needed one thing it could not have. [a universe away]

He did not feel when he stood, instead he felt the world sway, go sideways. Could not feel the floor beneath his feet, the slap of his hand against the wall in an instinctual attempt to keep himself upright. Did not feel when the world tuned him out, blew him out like a light bulb, did not feel when the pain consumed him and his shields finally fell, did not feel when he hit the ground.

The darkness had claimed him instead.

Comments

[dctr-mccoy.livejournal.com]

The biobed beeped quietly during the meld. Bones monitored from the side, watching Pike's vital signs as the Spocks leaned in and began their communications.

When Jim walked in, he looked up and saw Kirk's face, hot anger flashing in his eyes. One more glance at the bed, and Bones stepped over to where Kirk and Jim were standing. "Welcome to the circus," he murmured to Jim with a nod.

"Everything's stable right now, with all of them" he added, looking at Kirk, a slight shrug - he knew that the mind meld was freaking the shit out of Kirk right now.

[original-fine.livejournal.com]

Jim nodded, trying to regulate his breathing. The hardest part was knowing he couldn't do anything. He didn't even know if, or how, to lend Spock support. The bond was there, of course, but at best he might distract him by pushing something through it and at worst, get pulled into Pike's mind where he was merely a liability, a hostage Spock would be forced to protect at the cost of whatever else he was trying to do.

"It's a miracle he's not mad already," Jim muttered. "Spock was on his knees barely before Bones was taken away from us, and that was a new bond, weak in comparison. For Pike to still be on his feet, weeks later? For him to be capable of civil conversation? His self-control is astounding."

Conflict swirled through him, and though he had no training as yet, he tried instinctively to keep it from affecting Spock. He wanted to help Pike, as much as he feared for Spock's life and mind in this situation. He would protect Spock with everything he had. But he would not deny this man the opportunity for comfort, however slim. Whatever he'd done. His situation did not entirely excuse his actions, but it went a long way to explaining them. At the same time... Spock was worth more, far more.

He hated waiting, and standing around.

[just-uhura.livejournal.com]

Nyota glanced over as the other Kirk entered the room, eyes briefly averting from Spock to watch their exchange for a moment. She quickly looked away again, unable to help the feeling that she was intruding on something she had no part in. Instead she continued her silent watch, fingers fisting in the hem of her skirt to stop herself from reaching out and comforting - though who she had no clue.

"He's strong." She murmured, sensitive ears picking up their comments easily. "He's had to be." She could remember with perfect clarity what this +ike had told her, what her mind had filled in. She wasn't sure if Pikes strength was a comfort or not. All she could do was wait and see and hope they had someone sane to pass back. Despite her outward projection of calm, the suspense was killing her.

[sehlatbear.livejournal.com]

Spock was only distantly, vaguely aware of Jim's presence but the bond in his own mind flared up strongly.

We must find a more efficient path than this.

[cso-spock.livejournal.com]

Pike had given them permission to enter his mind, but yet still drew up his defenses for them. Didn't he realize that he was wasting time, prolonging his own pain?

Spock stepped forward through the left fork this time, just a few feet, and then stopped. He reached out his hand to press his palm against the wall to the side, feeling the shifting undercurrent of thoughts more directly.

Sir, He called out to him directly. A straight path, if you will?

[iron-command.livejournal.com]

With the touch came a flare of pain, aching through Spock's entire body, but also a sense of recognition as if Pike had not unconsciously realized who was treading in his mind. Unconscious defenses, then? The wall gave a heavy tremor under Spock's hand, then suddenly started to fall away. Walls crumbled, erected, shifted, until the two in his mind could see the way.

It was a magnificent labyrinth that would have kept even the strongest from finding their way easily. More likely then not, traps and pits and other deployments lived within its twisting pathways as well. Now there was a straight, stone lined path leading straight through it on an upward slope, leading towards what looked like a temple in the distance.

[sehlatbear.livejournal.com]

That was well done.

He cannot quite escape being a teacher in this, even in this place.

His own bonds flickering madly, flaring up and throbbing in sympathy, Spock advanced toward the temple, Spock at his side.

[original-fine.livejournal.com]

Jim still had no idea what was going on. But he could feel the throb of the bond with Spock, and he held on to it, disregarding whatever danger there might be. He could anchor Spock. He could be there, cradling that connection within him. There was nothing else to do.

[cso-spock.livejournal.com]

His focus nearly faltered with the pain, communicated so directly through his own mind. All of these complications resulting in painful consequences were beginning to put him off the idea entirely. Yet, he thought of those he cradled now, though of having Nyota's constant loving warmth with him...perhaps it was worth it, overall.

A moment to calm and the let the agony fade, before he walked alongside his counterpart, eyes always forward. Onto the next step.

[iron-command.livejournal.com]

The doors to the temple were massive things, ancient in design but crafted of new stone. A fire burned on either side of them, pushing back the darkness, but the fire was thin as if its fuel was running low. The flickering flames showed words carved into the door, thousands upon thousands of words, running into each other and yet somehow all separate. Vulcan, Terran, and like the first set of doors, the ancient Terran language of Latin. They were closed, and from the look of it, locked, protecting the inner most place of Pike's mind.

[sehlatbear.livejournal.com]

He had not considered, until his first pon farr, what a true sharing of minds entailed. The terrible naked vulnerability of the connections he shared with Jim and Leonard - much less the finer tendrils of connection with the others...

At the time, relief coursing through him that Jim was not truly dead, that he had not in fact killed his best friend, Spock would have said that there was no justification for the weakness that accompanied such ties. He surveyed the landscape of this Christopher Richard Pike's mind - this was the result of a bonding. This pain, this loss, this encroaching madness.

But he had spent too many years watching his parents, their secret glances with touching fingers. And this mind through which he traveled was also the result of the bond, shaped by it, sustained and preserved by it in a world that would brook no weakness in its alpha predators. And his own bonds...

He had collapsed. As a Star Fleet officer that alone should have been enough to convince Spock that the bonds were a bad idea. But he would not be the man he was, the officer he was, without the relationships he had with his t'hy'lara and there was no altering that.

Greater than the sum of their parts. The bonds made them more than they were on their own. The same seemed to be true for this Pike and his Spock. Together, they created something out of nothing, out of less than nothing. That was worth preserving.

We request entrance, Christopher Richard Pike.

[iron-command.livejournal.com]

Silence. Stillness. Nothing.

The flames crackled.

Then, suddenly, there was a low, deep growling (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gbkwSDX8_kc) from directly behind them.

[cso-spock.livejournal.com]

He did not appreciate the sound of that at all. Spock turned quickly to face whatever had crept up behind him, whatever devilish construct they were about to face now. However, he also backed up in the door, feeling the rough stone of it press into his thoughts along with the failing heat of the flames. He splayed the fingers back against the door, feeling carved inscriptions beneath his fingertips.

Maybe this would work, there wasn't anything to say it wouldn't besides his counterpart's failed request. All that mattered was getting inside to the sooth the pain, the ache practically radiating off the stone. Spock closed his eyes, and whispered.

Sanoi, Christopher.

[sehlatbear.livejournal.com]

He did not turn to look. Their path lay forward, not battling whatever had appeared behind them.

He placed his hand beside the younger Spock's and echoed the request. His own reserve was not helping.

Sanoi.

[iron-command.livejournal.com]

Before them stood what their entrance had warned of. Hic Sunt Dracones. Here Be Dragons. It was a massive scaled creature of giant proportions (http://www.3aka.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/three-headed-dragon1.jpg), a monster of legends, glaring at the intruders. Light rippled across glimpses of black scales edged in green, and three sets of glowing eyes watched the Spocks from three reptilian heads.

It roared, shaking the earth under their feet.

...Who?

[cso-spock.livejournal.com]

Us.

He would not allow himself to feel fear in this situation, though the dragon was terrifying in its own respect. Looking away from it would do him little good, though. The ferocity of it threatened to suffocate him.

Me. Spock.

[sehlatbear.livejournal.com]

The thread of a bond to his counterpart, Christopher's Spock, was still there - Christopher had walked it to find his lover, his mate, his t'hy'lara.

Spock threw open his own gates, wide, pulled on that thread as hard as he could to draw in the feel of Christopher's own Spock.

[iron-command.livejournal.com]

One of the dragon's heads came down in a rush of speed, a second one a split second later, maws wide open, breath of sulfur. Their teeth shone silver in the light, gold a moment later, dripping with ropey saliva, threatening to crush.

Then, all at once, they stopped only mere inches from both. One head growled low in the younger Spock's face, watching.

[cso-spock.livejournal.com]

He blinked at it, unfazed, and kept still where he was. Such defenses continued to waste time, and their goal was right behind them, so close.

Christopher. He said, more forcefully. Allow at least one of us in. We will not hurt you.

[sehlatbear.livejournal.com]

There was danger here. An obvious statement, Spock knew - they had been in danger the moment they had entered his mind. But to be separated.... The younger Spock was vulnerable, so alone still in his mind, and this Christopher Richard Pike, with the aching ends of his bond, would recognize that.

He focused on the thread, on the taste of his Spock that Christopher had found through this Spock's mind and broadcast it through his hand on the door, the flavor and scent and texture of Christopher's Spock.

[iron-command.livejournal.com]

Silence reigned except for the low, steady growl of the dragon. Then the doors cracked open behind Spock, opening only the smallest distance to allow a single person to creep through its stone defenses.

[cso-spock.livejournal.com]

Spock looked at his counterpart beside him. He was the more experienced one here, the one with the greater foundation and security with the protection of two bonds. His own mind was still vulnerable, open to connections, easily manipulated (in the grand scheme of things), and already so-called emotionally compromised by all of this...

But he meant what he said before the meld.

He slipped in through the opening.

[sehlatbear.livejournal.com]

This was, Spock admitted to himself, perhaps the sort of behavior that Jim objected to when Spock himself exhibited it - the self-sacrificing tendency to rush in.

Still projecting Christopher's Spock as strongly as he could, Spock tried to slip in after Spock, binding them together as tightly as could be imagined.

Spock!

He offered his hand to his counterpart - they would share minds, blend consciousnesses, present a unified identity.

If only they had thought to do so before the dragon had appeared. Still, heightened circumstances were often useful for stimulating new ideas.

[cso-spock.livejournal.com]

There was hesitation. He knew what he was offering, the benefit that would come with. It was logical to take his hand.

But there were emotions here, more easily triggered because of the effect of the human mind around him, the walls pressing into his thoughts. Jealousy, arrogance, he could remedy this problem by himself even though he knew he couldn't, why couldn't the other just stick his own bondmates--

Grudgingly, Spock took his hand.

[sehlatbear.livejournal.com]

Spock's shields were already open, blasted down to broadcast the sound and fury of Christopher's Spock. The contact with his younger counterpart was all that it took to hurtle the two together, no change in landscape this time but a curious bending of bodies, a lowering of boundaries, a strange dual consciousness overlaid with their individual observing voices.